If you follow my podcast, you know that I released a podcast episode entitled "The importance of Self-Forgiveness".
You can listen below to understand why forgiving yourself is a key factor when you build up self-trust to take your business to the next level.
(don't have time to listen now? Click here to save it for later)
But in this article, I want to talk about resentment and forgiveness in general. You know me, I'm all about diving straight into the topic without fluff so let's go.
Here's the map of the article:
Forgiveness is a personal journey
Forgiving is something that you do for yourself. Not for anybody else and like I said in the podcast, if there is ONE being you should always forgive... it has to be YOU!
When it comes to forgiving someone else, no one can force you to forgive them or to forgive whoever caused you harm nor do you have to force yourself to forgive.
It is a process, a personal journey that you decide to take in your own time and in your own terms.
It can take time and happen progressively, by "layers", a back-and-forth process.
When you forgive, you free yourself and you cut the remaining cords between you and the other human in question.
But you don't NEED to tell the other human in question that you forgive them, you can if you want, but you don't HAVE to. And you don't need to hear their apologies, even if you feel it's necessary, even if you'd like for them to realize the harm they've done, this is still giving them too much power.
If they had malevolent intentions towards you, it's between them and their karma, their life path, their lesson to learn. You don't need anyone approval or validation - only your own :)
In any case, forgive yourself for whatever you may reproach yourself with.
Self-forgiveness is a must.
Why resentment is toxic
Did you know that if you keep resentment within you, you're maintaining the connection with this person who hurt you in the 1st place?
This connection has the form of etheric cords, meaning an energy "thread" that still connects you to the hurtful human/situation in question.
It can create an energy leak and contribute to keeping you stuck emotionally and mentally - as much as you want to move froward, you feel you can't.
These cords need to be cut!
(PSSST: I have a no-brainer and super affordable course that teaches you how to cut cords and release toxic relationships, click here to check it out)
Not only that... but maintaining the energies of resentment and holding them in your body actually creates energy toxics. These energies get stuck in certain organs (liver, kidneys...) and are lowering your vibrational frequency (basically affecting your energy and your wellness).
These energies can create discomfort, pains and if they're not released, they can even create more serious "dis-eases" as time goes by as far as health and wellness are concerned.
To talk about business, these lower vibrations can also affect your business. You can't compartment energy. If you're holding onto lower vibrational energies, even if it's in one area of your life, all areas are going to be affected:
You might be holding yourself back, restricting yourself, placing limitations... all of this is SUBCONSCIOUS, you're not doing it on purpose (so don't blame yourself, that's how human nature is, that's how the human mind works and that's an energy rule) yet it's still affecting your against your will. You can't know what you're not aware of, right?
This can affect:
your client attraction,
your performances,
your productivity,
your mental clarity (your thoughts aren't clear, like there's a "program" running in the back ground - aka this unfinished business, which could even turn into an obsession in some cases)
your enthusiasm, your joy and therefore your life force
your creativity
your level of energy
I feel you, it can be hard to forgive someone, I have struggled to forgive too but when I learned more about forgiveness, I realized I also had to forgive myself.
Of course, at first I thought "why do I have to forgive myself for what someone else has done to me?" and I know it can be a tough one in some circumstances...
But in reality, it's forgiving yourself for all these times you thought badly about yourself, felt guilty, abandoned yourself, rejected yourself and also for whatever situation happened in another life that might have contributed to create this situation.
It's important to always forgive yourself, then the rest comes easier.
Check out my course "How to release toxic relationships and stand in your power" here
Freeing yourself and taking your power back
Here again, you don't heal resentment for anyone else but YOURSELF!
That's the 1st step towards freedom!
Think about it this way: Why would you let a toxic human or situation poison your now and create hindrances for your future for something that happened in the past? That'd make them "win" or more important than they actually are... and no one wants that, right?
I'm aware it's easier said than done sometimes, but no matter how hard it is, it needs to be done and you have to be ready to take these steps.
This is also part of the work I do with my clients, reconnect them with themselves so they can take their power back.
Most of the time, they're ready to revisit old memories and situations, so we go in the "energy realm", to a safe place within their subconscious field so they can get back in touch with the past memory and bring it into healing.
It's important to know that you'll only face what you're physically, mentally and emotionally ready to deal with.
This work is always done for the highest and greatest good, with integrity and respect.
My clients are actively part of their healing process, which makes it even more powerful!
It also helps them build up their self-trust, their trust in their own abilities because I'm here to guide them and I witness the same thing as they are seeing and during a session - we work in the energy real aka the quantum field.
You can of course heal resentment by yourself, keep reading for some tips below right after I talk about the positive outcomes.
The outcomes of healing resentment and forgiving
You can see benefits of releasing resentment whether you work by yourself or with me of course.
My sessions help my client move forward faster!
They release and let go of heavy emotions and burdens that had been stuck in their system, affecting their emotional, mental and sometimes physical health too.
They feel a sense of relief and peace, they gain clarity on their life experiences.
Then acceptance comes (acceptance = accepting you can't change the past but you give yourself permission to shift your perspective and move forward stronger than ever).
Healing resentment and bringing situations / people and yourself into forgiveness also enables to release the energy pattern from your energy field and subconscious mind (which governs 90 to 95% of our physical reality) so the negative pattern that's keeping you stuck will not be repeating anymore. You break the cycle!
When you gain awareness on something, you can tell if/when it's about to repeat, then you can respond accordingly and it becomes a choice, you take responsibility and you're an empowered self-leader.
Here are a few more outcomes:
you bring closure to a situation that had been "pending", some unfinished business for more peace
when you do so, the word "victim" doesn't apply to you anymore. As I always say, being a victim is something temporary, we can all be victims of circumstances, or horrible situations, or you name it. But "victim" doesn't have to define us. When we heal, we don't resonate with that word anymore (and this has nothing to do with bypass or denial).
You give yourself permission to stand in your power and take responsibility for your action, responses and reactions - you see life happening for you and not to you, definitely not against you!
you remove old and stagnant energies, which gives you momentum to move forward and upward
you expand your consciousness and open yourself to new ideas, new ways of doing things, new strategies
you DARE, you're ready to get out of your conform zone and talk about your business, what you do, you trust yourself to bring results to your clients and to try new things, new strategies that you didn't dare do before because of false beliefs
your soul gifts unlock, you remember your innate abilities and unleash your potential
you see things in terms of experiences and lessons, you keep going and shifting fast!
you're freer than before, you can work towards your goals without brain fog, without having these scenarios on a loop in your head
you are also emotionally free, you go less through an emotional rollercoaster and here too, you're able to shift faster emotionally (vs emotionally abusing yourself and responding to the chemicals released by your system that can create an addition for every one of us until we know better)
you attract new people, clients, contracts, opportunities that are a vibrational match with your current frequency; in other words, you feel more aligned, less struggles, less stress, more ease, more clarity and focus...
How to heal resentment
So how to actually heal resentment in terms of steps to take?
Here are 4 things you can do today - either by yourself or when you team up with me:
1) You can use my free resources (blog, podcast, the free masterclass below) or decide to accelerate your journey, gain time and save yourself unnecessary detours by working 1:1 with me in my Unshakeable 8-week mentorship.
2) Book your free clarity call to gain clarity on what's currently keeping you stuck and then decide what route you want to take (either do it yourself or team up with me), I'd be happy to have a chat with you :)
3) Try this exercise by follow these steps:
a) write a letter to the human being you're feeling resentment towards. Explain everything: what they did, how it affected you, how you felt, etc.
Don't hold yourself back, write everything that comes up, this letter is a healing tool, you're not going to give it to anyone (unless you would desire so of course but it's not necessary in the process I'm sharing)
b) once you're done, observe how you feel, your emotions, thoughts... and place your hands on your heart
c) see if you feel ready to bring forgiveness towards them, if yes, say it mentally or write it down, if not, don't force it and trust that the process has been launched. You can always get back to it later.
d) write 2 letters to yourself:
- start with the version of yourself you were when the situation in question happened who writes a letter to the now you, telling you all of that he/she felt, what he/she needed at the time;
- then you'll reply to that letter, meaning the "now you" will write a letter back to the past version of you who's still suffering and tell him/her you're there, you'll always be there and bring everything into forgiveness.
e) focus on your heart space and burn the 3 letters you have written in total.
(Side note: if you prefer typing it, you can, but writing has a more personal and powerful energy, you're actually letting things out of your body through your hand that's holding the pen and it gets materialised on paper with the ink, then burnt to be transmuted)
4) Access my free Self-Forgiveness Healing Meditation that you get as an audio file when you unlock my free Self-Trust Building masterclass here
I'm looking forward to connecting with you and feel free to get in touch via the contact form (bottom of page) if you need clarity!
Take care,
Morgane